Blogging – And How I Got it Wrong

I think I’ve had the wrong idea about blogging. When I first started writing a blog it was to introduce myself to others and to get to know other writers/ authors/poets/artists. Oh and to find different genres of books.

One of my first blogs that disappeared into the ether and was apparently seen by no one! http://www.judithbarrow.co.uk/11-random-facts-about-me/

But I’ve been lucky; I’ve made some online friends along the way who, I hope, would be the kind of friend I’d like to have in ‘real’ life. Some, especially, have been so supportive.

http://bit.ly/1F9PBUW

http://bit.ly/1LLzdQ6

/ http://bit.ly/1KvuYJR

http://bit.ly/1KVVozc

http://uviart.blogspot.co.uk/p/guest-interview.html

http://thestoryreadingapeblog.com/

And I’ve tried to help and support in return.

But lately I’ve noticed two things. There have been posts asking for more followers (one in particular was asking to raise the numbers because it was her/his birthday). And the others have been blogs to celebrate that a certain number of followers has been achieved.

Chasing numbers.

Now don’t get me wrong; if that’s what’s important to these bloggers, that’s fine, it’s no business of mine. And there has to be a reason for ‘upping the ante’ to get to a certain number of followers. For instance, perhaps, for authors, it’s about finding new readers, or, for certain causes, it’s to highlight that charity/society/ organisation.

And then I read this from Hugh: http://linkis.com/hughsviewsandnews.com/Sy3Um

And I remembered Hugh’s blog from a while ago: http://linkis.com/hughsviewsandnews.com/Lf7r6

I read it again. I mulled over this for a while. I looked back at some of my own posts. I saw who’d commented and/or shared. I thought about it. I left the thought to simmer.

Wise advice in both posts.

And it’s occurred to me that I jumped on the band wagon – so to speak – and I’ve  dutifully followed everyone who, I’ve been informed, follows me.

But I have a problem (well, actually I have lots of problems – thought I’d add that bit before I heard a wave of snorts of derision; ‘a problem, Judith?’ ‘Just the one problem?’) My problem is I have two sites I blog from, purely by choice. It’s been a deliberate choice. I use my other site: http://www.judithbarrow.co.uk/ initially for my personal posts, the ones I actually write myself: about my life and the things that have happened to me, my own interviews with authors, my reviews of the books I read for Rosie Amber’s Review Team; https://rosieamber.wordpress.com/ . On this site: https://judithbarrowblog.com/   I copy the blogs from the first site but mainly I use BarrowBlogs to mention/promote other authors, other bloggers’ interviews with authors, other peoples’ thoughts on all sorts of subjects.

Having the two sites works for me.

And I do try to follow the excellent advice given here: http://dreambigdreamoften.co/2015/08/30/how-to-share-your-way-to-more-exposure/

So what to do? I don’t want to be like the blogger who wrote a post saying that she had so many followers she’d stopped reading anything they wrote and just ‘liked’ the posts. I try to read everything I’m sent. And yes, I know that’s probably daft and very few do that. But I do!

I’ve made a decision! I’ve decided it’s quality not quantity. Besides I’ve noticed that the same bloggers who do  like my contributions to the blogging world, also share other types of posts I’m interested in; what I would choose to like, share and comment on. I won’t name them; it wouldn’t be fair. But they do know who they are.

So, I’m thinking, why not just follow and share their posts?

To sum up, I’m taking Hugh’s advice and have trawled through the bloggers I’ve been following for ages and who he calls ‘Ghost Followers’. I’ll carry on much the same when it comes to commenting and sharing stuff I’ve enjoyed reading – but I’ll keep an eye out and delete those who ‘pretend’ to follow but don’t. Please don’t think of that as a threat, it’s not; it’s what I intend to do for ‘self – care’.

I read this today http://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/27/message-in-a-bottle/  and I know that the way I blog isn’t perfect (or even close to it) And it’s up to anyone to decide whether  I’m interesting or boring and to follow or not

But the bottom line is I can’t carry on supporting those who I never see hide or hair of.

I’ll always try to acknowledge anybody who takes the trouble to let me know they’ve seen any of my personal posts; it’s only courteous and I enjoy the banter.  I do like meeting and chatting to people but …  I need to stay connected with my ‘friendly’ bloggers

And, like you all, I have a life away from here. And a book to write

See you on the other side of the screen.

Judith

Oh – a bit of a promotion here:

Links to my books:

Amazon .co.uk:

http://amzn.to/1z7ojhY

http://amzn.to/1N3GPQ6

http://amzn.to/1Fth8jR

Amazon.com:

http://amzn.to/1IxMhTA

http://amzn.to/1EsonO3

http://amzn.to/1Kn8QBU

Honno.co.uk:

http://honno.co.uk/index.php

http://bit.ly/1O2M7IL

http://bit.ly/1JGhULC

http://bit.ly/1Un5iPu

med full colour honno logo

119 thoughts on “Blogging – And How I Got it Wrong

  1. I have also read the blog post by Hugh regarding the different types of bloggers and agree with him. I too am having a good look through and sorting out my blog this week,
    I have to say it is flattering to know that people want to read my blog, and I do on occasion, get carried away by numbers! However, for me it is so much more about interacting with others, enjoying the banter as you pointed out, and getting to know people, I don’t blame you for having a bit of a cull! 🙂

    Liked by 7 people

    • It really was a’light bulb’ moment – or should I say few days of light bulb moment. Hugh makes so much sense. I feel I have come to ‘know’ some bloggers and enjoy their post and comments on mine.(yourself included, of course!) I think I got carried away with the whole idea. x

      Liked by 5 people

  2. I agree that quality is the key. Yet, nowadays, time just doesn’t allow us to read all of the blogs. I see a like as an acknowledgement that someone at least visited my site. And last, I blog to share my thoughts. Thanks for sharing this and making me think this Monday morning. Lynn M.

    Liked by 6 people

    • Sounds to me as though you have got it right, and for most of us getting it right does take a bit of practice. I’m certainly still practising!

      Carry on enjoying your blogging and also the interaction with those who are true followers – think you have going to have great fun.

      Liked by 3 people

    • HI Lynn, I think I’ve tried too hard to read everything. It does feel wrong not to ‘like’ but I didn’t want to do that unless I’d read the post. I wouldn’t want to ‘like’ something I didn’t like or agree with. I did wonder if I’d cause offence but posted after much thought anyway. Thank you for your comment – I appreciate it.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. In the beginning I also tried to re-follow anyone who followed me, and I managed to keep up with reading *most* of their posts.
    However, for one reason or another, I have been unable to get on to my blog for a few months and I am now feeling overwhelmed – so much catching up to do! I’m going to have to be (very) picky if I’m ever going to get back on track.

    Liked by 4 people

    • It was that coming back from a few days away and finding so many messages in my inbox that overwhelmed me as well. But, as I’ve said in the post, I’ve realised there are certain bloggers who post and share the kind of things I would search out anyway. So I’ll stick to keeping an eye on those. It’s the ‘Ghost Followers’ (Hugh’s phrase and I love it!) that I’m weeding out. Oh, the relief!. Good luck with getting back on track and your deleting. Actually I’d just start from scratch if I were you, No one expects backdating too far I don’t think. x

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Excellent post, Judith.
    Blogging, like life calls for some self-reflection at times. I’ve been doing a lot of it myself and made a lot of changes. I think you hit the nail on he head.
    And thank you kindly for the mention. I hop this day is treating you well. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • You’re very welcome. This day has been extraordinary! Took time out to go walking with very patient and sometimes neglected Husband
      And came back to so many responses to my post.. And so many have been thinking the same thing; We all need balance in our lives. I think I would have struggled on until I just gave up if it wasn’t for Hugh’s posts.

      Like

  5. Wow, Judith, just wow! I never dreamt that somebody would actually write a blog post about taking some advice from other bloggers and writers (especially when it includes me) and publish it. You don’t know how good it makes me feel to know that you have taken some of the advice I have recently published and are actually going to use it. Thank you so much for not only mentioning me and my blog in your post but also for all the support you have given to me by sharing and re-blogging my posts here and on social media.

    I hope it all works out for you and I’d love to hear back from you once you have started to action some of the advice you have read. I’m thrilled to hear that you are not allowing your blogs to live by numbers.

    Best wishes to you,
    Hugh

    Liked by 4 people

    • Hugh, I’m dizzy from all the comments and replies I’ve had to my post. And I hope I haven’t missed answering anyone. It just shows, doesn’t it? Here we sit, all alone and yet sometimes words away from our ‘real world’ resonate. I keep saying it was a ‘light bulb’ moment yet it took a while for the thoughts to simmer (actually until your second post )and then I knew I had to do something. And there have been so many other bloggers who feel/ have felt the same as I did. And so many who have read and agree with your posts or have said they will seek them out. I’m actually indebted to you for this weight that has been lifted. Still some ‘Ghost Followers ‘ to weed out but I’m getting there. Jx.

      Liked by 2 people

  6. Reblogged this on Hugh's Views & News and commented:
    Judith is taking action about her blogging and I was thrilled to read that some of the advice she has taken came from me.
    She is no longer allowing her blogs to live by numbers.
    Read what plans Judith is putting into place and maybe think about joining her on her quest to make blogging a far more enjoyable experience.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. If you followed everyone … and did them all justice… you wouldn’t have time to breathe, let alone write! I keep up as best I can, but follow only a fraction of those who follow my blog. I can’t always comment on everything I read, but I always try and leave a footprint as an acknowledgement at least. Blogging can’t be about numbers… only people.

    Liked by 5 people

    • Oh I knew you’d understand, Sue. I thought a lot about what to do about blogging and realized I only wanted to read certain posts from certain people. Numbers really don’t matter to me in the end. I love interviewing and sharing other authors’ news, I like (a lot) humour. And I love the beauty of nature and posts on nature. And, being naturally nosey, love finding out about other bloggers. Jx

      Liked by 2 people

      • I do like discovering new writers and sites, but there really are only so many hours in a day… and once you get to know people through the blogs, those are the priorities. Friends. x

        Liked by 3 people

  8. Well I’m quite new to your blog, and didnt realise you had two of them! I dont know how you do it… and write books… and take care of family and personal life! I struggle with just the one! I’m trying to follow Hugh’s excellent advice too. Ive ow realised I cant read every post from every blog, but try to read at least some from them all. Simplify your life, that’s what I think! We tend to always do the opposite!

    Liked by 4 people

    • Hi Ali, I like having the two blogs. BarrowBlog is really just a showcase for authors and their reviews and interviews – it’s easy to manage. I’ve been trying too hard to cover everything and Hugh’s post made me re-evaluate and check on ‘old followers. I couldn’t believe how many no longer followed me or just sent me their posts. It’s all a learning curve. Thanks for dropping by.x

      Liked by 2 people

  9. I’ll add my name as another blogger who’s heeding Hugh’s advice. I spend hours reading blogs and commenting, and need to make choices about where I spend my time or I’ll have to stop sleeping! You are so right, Judith, numbers are just numbers; they mean nothing unless there’s something valuable backing them up. I’ve starting thoughtfully winnowing down the number of blogs I follow, dropping those that haven’t engaged in mutual relationship. I doubt they’ll even notice. This will give me more time to devote to the wonderful community that I’m getting to know. ❤

    Liked by 6 people

    • Hi Diana, I feel exactly the same as you know. Hugh’s a wise old owl, I think – and manages his blogging well, I’ve seen. It’s such a relief to know others feel the same as I do. Thank you for your kind comments.x

      Liked by 3 people

  10. Judith, it seems Hugh’s post was a smash hit with many of us bloggers. I left him comment on his blog about how much his concept has helped me figure out how to handle all the blogs I follow (which I’m still in the process of doing), and consequently, I’ll be posting this week about it too. It seems I’ve come across a few bloggers since last week who have been posting about the same subject. It only makes sense that we have to revamp when we are trying to write, blog and live life, and that’s a lot of keeping up! 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Hallelujah as I’m taking root and not writing too much….sense needs to prevail methinks…I am trying to follow Hugh’s good advice but it’s near nigh impossible for me to keep my inbox from busting at the seams. I set my timer now and read the ones that interest me or make me laugh first. Have unfollowed some. It’s a slow process but I believe I will be happier and i will have more to write and do other things . Most of all I have met some like minded people who it’s pleasure to know so thank you Judith for just reinforcing a few things 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  12. I know when I first started blogging a few months ago that I was a teensy bit envious of those who had 1,000 followers or 10,000 followers. But really, the number of followers means nothing if there is no social interaction. I do my best to pay attention to those who kindly visit my blog and leave comments, and I do the same back for them because those are the bloggers who are my true followers. Great post 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you for your reply. I don’t think I ever thought of keeping track of followers (perhaps it’s because I hate numbers – having been told to sit quietly at the back of the class in Maths. Hah!) But I agree completely that it’s better to have followers who like or disagree,share or comment on my posts sometimes – than just notch me up as a number and ignore anything and everything I’ve posted. Grateful for your comment on this post. Cheers!

      Liked by 2 people

  13. Reblogged this on Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life and commented:
    Judith Barrow is doing a little spring cleaning. I know that we are all guilty of following people and not heading off to their blogs as often as we might. The social media platforms are geared to encouraging you to have as many followers as possible but in reality it usually ends up being a circle of up to 20 or perhaps 30 that you communicate with on a regular basis and then others from time to time. I value all of those who interact and having Judith in the community is amazing as she is so generous with her sharing of posts. Mine have reached so many more people because of her kindness.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Sally, that’s a lovely thing to say. Thank you. I love your posts and your generosity to other authors. Getting to know writers from all over was my primary gaol when I started blogging. I’ve been lucky in so many ways through some of the people I’ve met and it’s really settled down to a lovely steady number. But lately I’ve realised I’ve been trying to be fair to everyone – and that was just not going to be possible with the numbers I’d somehow gained. Hugh made me think, as I’ve said and , when I checked I realised so many were just what he calls, ‘Ghost Followers. I have to say it’s been a relief to discover that and be able to delete them. Jxc

      Liked by 2 people

  14. Sigh. Every word here is so true, Judith. I’m for quality not quantity as well. It’s impossible to do it all and have a life of your own. I’ve been doing some weeding myself this summer and this fall I’m flipping my day around to suit my schedule better. Decision. decisions. 😀

    Liked by 3 people

    • Hooray, you’re back, Tess. Hope you’ve had a great break. It’s been a slow snowball effect, building up so many followers without me really being aware of it. Hugh’s posts made me stop and think. And what a relief it is. I’ve noticed those bloggers who share so much – and discovered those who haven’t. I don’t feel one bit guilty guilty about weeding them out – at all!!! jx

      Liked by 2 people

  15. Totally agree…I feel if someone takes the time to write something or reblog something, I should have the time to read it. And you’re right…it should be what I like reading, not just go through the reader and like…like…like…Great post!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks Patrick. Must admit to being a bit nervous as I pressed ‘published’ – not knowing what the reaction would be. And then I thought, what the heck, honesty is the best policy (my students would be shouting, cliché, cliché there!!). I’ve written ‘Quality not Quantity’ on my wall – just in case I find myself falling into the trap again. Cheers. J

      Liked by 2 people

  16. My question is ‘why write the post?’ Followers, even ghost followers will give an immediate response, 40 or 50 likes and a few comments and then the post will wither and die. Much better I think to write posts that have legs and go on attracting readers for days, weeks and months after the original posting. Is a blog for community or posterity? I don’t always agree with Hugh on this point.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Andrew, Do you mean why did I write the post? It’s a good question so I’ll try to answer as best I can. I always try to be fair and assuming that followers will like/comment/share some (not all) my posts, I did the same for them. After I’d read Hugh’s posts I decided to check what had happened over the last twelve months – and I saw that it was always the same people who reciprocated. Now, as I said, I don’t expect that everyone will find me scintillating, witty and with great things to impart. And I certainly don’t write them for posterity – but oh how I’d like my books to stick around for a while after I’m gone!). But I have better things to do with my time (like looking after my family/ teaching/writing my books/ giving talks/ sharing other authors’ news & posting their interviews – as well as interacting with the bloggers I’ve come to know and like – and to enjoy being part of the community. than, quite frankly, giving publicity and time to bloggers who pretend to follow and don’t. I’m really not interested in building up numbers – just in being part of the lovely world of bloggers and other social mediums. I would challenge your remark about “even ghost followers will give an immediate response, 40 or 50 likes and a few comments…” I found a lot who had never even ‘liked’ from the beginning. It all boils down to self- preservation and enjoying what I do. As I say, it’s quality not quantity that’s important to me and to enjoy being part of a community. What it is to others is not my business – but I don’t need to be part of their band- wagon. I appreciate you dropping by and I’m grateful for your comments. All the best. J

      Liked by 2 people

      • We appear to be saying the same thing. I quite enjoy the immediate reaction to a new post but it is more important to me that some posts stick around and continue to attract readers long after posting date. Posts that generate an immediate reaction and a number of comments often just sink without trace.

        Liked by 2 people

  17. Pingback: Hurry Up and WAIT… and Other Miscellaneous Bits | Silver Threading

  18. Coming over from Hugh’s site. To me it’s all subjective. I do follow blogs who respond to my blog posts with just a like – primarily because I enjoy their blogs and I try not to take it personally if they don’t leave a comment. I call them my friendly ghosts. I have noted that there are a few bloggers who constantly reblog (5-10 times a day!!) and that makes the job of keeping up with my buddy bloggers and friendly ghosts really hard. I imagine constant re-blogging would raise my stats but I try to keep my reader’s time constraints into consideration. I have no intention of bombarding them with re-blogs just to get more followers but I’m a bit of a contrarian! Provocative blog!

    Liked by 3 people

  19. Judith, this is a great post – especially as shown by the interest it has generated. You are always entertaining and also generous! I am starting to get an idea of which of my posts have been most interesting to readers and honing what I do. I would love to spend all day reading other people’s posts, but I need time to write. I try to drop by all of my favorites once or twice a week.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Noelle. I too have been thinking of my personal posts and how to make them more interesting. But I do like to share about other writers etc as well. Trouble is I then go on to look at the books they write and then buy them hahaha ( which is what’s intended in a way, I suppose! ) Now I only have to find a way of finding more hours in a day than twenty four. Thank you for dropping by.x

      Liked by 1 person

  20. These “don’t fuss over numbers” themed posts pop up in my reader all the time.

    Every single one of them are written by bloggers who have a large number of followers; one had over 100,000 followers.

    I do not believe any of the authors are being deliberately pretentious, but it is a little unsettling and overly forthright, kind of like a rich man telling a poor man that “money isn’t everything”.

    I wonder if the 100,000 follower guy would assure himself with the same advice if he woke up one morning and discovered he had suddenly dropped to 50 followers.

    At the other end of the scale, I’ve never heard a 50 follower guy say he/she was fine with that and truly did not care if they ever did any better.

    Thanks for the thoughtful post. I am also a Fan of Hugh and found this article through his website.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for your comments, Chris. Another stop and think moment for me. And I have to say, I am truly am ‘guy’ um girl/woman/blogger who isn’t bothered about numbers. So now you’ve met one here. I suppose I didn’t realise what blogging was all about when I started. As i said in my post, I only wanted to introduce myself to the writing world and find other anthers.Bit naive of me I suppose. I just love being amongst other writers both here and in the real world. Since I started getting the stuff I wrote out (after years of squireling it away – and after something happened that made me realise I’d better get on with it) it’s opened up a whole new scene for me and I love it. But I’m not daft, either, I know it pleases my publishers that I am all over the place on social media. But I think Facebook, Twitter etc. are a whole different ball game. Numbers happen there without any warning and it doesn’t matter because it’s good fun to share the humour and interesting facts and authors in a few seconds. Unlike blogging where, I thin, quality matters more than quantity. Hope that makes sense?

      Liked by 2 people

  21. Pingback: Why Blog? | Mother Wintermoon

  22. I loved your post. I think this is quite a prominent theme in the blogging world at the minute, and I shared Hugh’s post a while ago because I enjoyed it and it made sense.

    The blogging community only becomes a community if everyone is on board. I’ve been lucky to have found wonderful people who regularly share my posts all across their social media, and I’m ashamed to say that I don’t return the favour as often as I would like, mainly due to time constraints. I do read a massive amount of posts, but I don’t take time to comment and say something about it. Your post, and Hugh’s, has inspired me to change that…

    Slightly off track a little, but any blogger with high numbers who says that numbers don’t matter to them is lying. When I first started writing, it was for therapy, but now I have become a self-confessed stat obsessive I now focus on numbers as much as I do content, because I find it exciting. Whether anyone will believe this or not, I am never in competition with anyone else, but with myself, and as my numbers have grown they have become more important to allow me to monetise my blog.

    However, numbers are never what they seem. I had a conversation with someone not long ago who has a seemingly small readership, but over the last two months her number of views was quadruple than that of a blogger with six times her readership who blogs sometimes two or three times a day because she has cracked how to share her posts effectively on social media.

    Numbers and readership will always mean different things to different people, but if you are constantly putting time into other people and getting nothing in return, then it may be a waste of time in the long run…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Suzie, I have been quite surprised with the response it received. I have to admit it was rather an off the cuff post because I’d been mulling it over for a while and thought I should say what I intended to do (that is, delete what Hugh calls the Ghost Followers, those who give nothing back. )I’ve been lucky with some of the bloggers I share posts with – they have been very generous. And I hope I reciprocate. But I teach, I write and have a life outside my study. So something had to give. Good to hear from you.

      Like

      • You’re welcome – I often find that the off the cuff posts are the ones that are the most popular because they’re the ones that are straight from the mind and heart without too much analysis first… It deserves to be well received because it was a great post!

        Liked by 1 person

  23. As a very new WordPress blogger I’m anxious not to shove my posts down people’s throats. At the same time, I do want to develop a following. It isn’t about numbers per se – it’s about quality & interaction. My main aim is to create interest in my forthcoming novel but in addition, I genuinely enjoy writing about the process of creating a story. I did it on Live Journal for nine years & it was a rewarding, useful experience. It takes time to build up a new readership & I’m banking on that plus word of mouth. So far – it’s slow! I read the blogs I’ve chosen to follow & try to comment.

    Great post, Judith! Thank you. xXx

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Yes, I have a similar problem, but I’ve adopted a slightly different solution. I find I can still read everything I’m sent by simply no longer sleeping. I’ve also written to the United Nations asking if we can now have 96-hour days.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. I see your point. I am guilt of making a post when I got to 100 followers but then I was genuinely excited that 100 people could be bothered to follow my blog. I know there is a lot of ‘you follow my blog I’ll follow yours.’ I always follow someone who follows me out of politeness. I do put aside quite a bit of time to read other blogs but now have got to the stage were I have too many so I tend to look down the reader picking out the ones that look good. I have had to unfollow a few I found frankly objectionable. The wide net approach means I have read a lot of very interesting articles I would have never dreamed of looking at if I had just search tags. I think it’s important not to close yourself of to new ideas. One day one of your ghost followers might just post the thing you need. BTW I am going to follow you because I enjoyed reading this article don’t feel obliged to follow me back 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Aptly said. I think most of us bloggers could easily grow our numbers by simply “following” a multitude of blogs. It’s been a learning curve for me, and I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings by not following them back, but I’ve learned to only follow blogs that I can commit to reading (and commenting on).

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Pingback: Re-blog: Blogging – And How I Got it Wrong | Barrow Blogs: | writerchristophfischer

  28. Hi Judith,
    It’s Janice. Hugh just told me about your spin-off post to his post about his 4-Group approach to finding time to support the bloggers that support him.
    It sounds like you like his plan and plan to follow suit.
    I have also read Debby Kaye’s spin off post and am linking to it in my post coming out in about an hour.
    I’ve never written a spin off post before. Interesting that we both that thought to do that. I guess, as they say, “Great minds think alike.”
    Nice to see you. I’m glad you have such an engaged community here.
    Janice

    Liked by 2 people

  29. Great post Judith. I came to you via Cristoph Fischer and was happy to see that you’re using Hugh’s approach. I had “pressed” his wonderful advice on managing followers but haven’t got there yet. I’m overwhelmed with trying to keep up quality interactions with my followers and feeling guilty when I don’t.
    It’s wonderful to see all the comments from like-minded bloggers here. I love having followers but there is a disproportionate number who followed and evaporated. I always did follow backs as a courtesy but the one-sidedness is wearing thin and at this point, I think I need staff to maintain quality blog relationships!
    I think I now have “permission” to do a (large) cull. My sanity, schedule, ADD and real life will thank me.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hi Karen, it’s strange how the guilt creeps up when we miss or don’t have the time to ‘like’ or share others’ posts. It was a huge stop and think moment when I realised I hadn’t actually worked on my WIP for days because I was spending the time I managed to fit in, here art my desk,going through the blogs. Hugh’s post gave me the incentive to go through my ‘followers’- and ‘ghost bust’!! Jx

      Liked by 2 people

      • You are so right Judith! A sad trend I’ve noticed here on WP in the last few months is a new breed of blogger. They treat WP as they would Twitter or FB, here only to get followers with next to no content. As the number of “Follow Me” type comments & links (with no other interaction & which go immediately to “Spam”), I really had to stop and think about why I feel any qualms at all about unfollowing people. It’s still hard but like you, I have no time to write because I’m being “social”.
        I can feel the burden lifting just knowing I’m not the only one.

        Liked by 1 person

  30. Reblogged this on The Eclectic Poet and commented:
    I’ve been really feeling this concept for a long while now. Judith’s post is en pointe with regard to managing blog followers and she is using ideas that Hugh posted about recently – I hadn’t had a chance yet to pull Hugh’s post out of my saved “Press This” file – links to it are in Judith’s post. I highly recommend reading both posts.
    I am utterly overwhelmed with blogging at the moment – I have four blogs, work, home business, family and life. Oh! I don’t just joke about ADD / OCD – that’s for reals.
    I think it’s time for a little “ghost busting” and for any of you who are feeling the same, there’s so great advice here.
    Wishing you all a peaceful Sunday. K~xx

    Liked by 2 people

  31. I took Hugh’s advice to heart as well and have been going through my ghost bloggers. There is nothing so good as having a friend ask about your dog, or hubby by name when you haven’t mentioned them in a while, there are some wonderful writers on WordPress who so generously support each other.

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  32. This was an interesting read. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I used to check my stats page because it was there, and I decided I would stop doing that. I prefer to have quality interactions and that means a lot of risk taking. Sometimes, people don’t respond enthusiastically, or even at all. I am talking about subscribers. By reaching out to people, I find out which subscribers are simply making up numbers.

    I mentioned this on someone’s blog about a similar situation but people who complain about not enough interactivity or not having enough subscribers usually don’t want to do anything for anyone else. One woman ordered me to follow her blog to watch her move into her house. I thought that response was a bit rude when someone wishes you good luck. That is certainly not how it works.

    Quite a few expect to find a magic pill. I was impressed the other day when a photographer with 9,000 + subscribers came by to visit and when I found his blog and stopped for a chat. This person is a professional and I respect him because he took the time out for a new person. It is important to keep the dialogue going with others who are like or unlike us, if that is what we want. Some of my subscribers don’t want a lot of activity and turn off comments or like buttons. I still send them an email to let them know I am there.

    The culling is, sadly, a very important part of keeping things in balance. It is hard to see everyone at the same time but the best way for me to know who my blogging friends are, is to talk to them. It takes time but I have one blog and I don’t post every day so I can use the “down time” to catch up with my subscribers. Best decision I have ever made.

    Thank you for your timely post.

    Liked by 2 people

  33. I used to read all the posts from the people that followed me and who I followed and then they followed me and so on and around we go. But sometimes there are so many posts I just got tired. I love the whole blogging community, there seems to be little niches for everyone out there. I did this whole blogging thing because I was advised to have an author platform. But my platform is really just a couple of planks tied together floating in a sea of others with much fancier platforms. So – numbers are not important to me. Putting out good quality posts that I enjoy re-reading months later and that others enjoy too is much more important.
    PS. And I like little comments from my blogging friends. It always makes me happy.

    Liked by 2 people

  34. This was so good to read J. I’ve become conscious of the fact that I have not been spending enough time in the right places on WP. You would think it’s a massive task to identify those you want and need to support but it isn’t really. It isn’t the numbers, its the quality that counts. Funnily enough, I think we would find the same names would be the ones that will be popping up in the Group A lists. The Judiths, the Hughs, the Sallys etc. Bee x

    Like

    • It is a fact, Bee, the people I follow share so much for other bloggers, yet give so much of themselves as well. I, actually only write personal blogs about once a month – usually about something I care about or something that has happened to me.And it usually starts off on the site. My other site is mainly to promote and share authors and blogs by the Hughs/ sSllys/Sues/Great Ape etc Oh and the review team I belong to #RBRT headed by the lovely and generous Rosie Amber. It does work for me. So, when I decided I must cut out the ‘Ghost Followers’ I knew who I wanted to follow. Sometimes life and writing does take precednce but I know the bloggers I follow understand and make allowances. Time online means more to me now – and not the overload it became. Jx

      Liked by 1 person

      • I am in the process of “fixing” now. I am so glad you posted this. I actually was directed to it through Hugh’s blog. You are right with what you have said J. I’m already finding I’m getting to read more from the people I want to. Bee x

        Liked by 1 person

      • It does work, Bee. What’s even better is that, on the occasion, my bloggers re-blog something I have no interest in or don’t want to re-blog myself – nobody takes offence and I don’t feel guilty. (And I can do feeling guilty really well!)Jx

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ha! I can imagine you would be like that with the guilt thing. I hope your stream-lining is helping … helping you get more time to write your book! Bee x

        Liked by 1 person

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