Another hilarious gem from Alan Roberts, student of one of my creative writing classes. His first two posts were here: http://bit.ly/29u7vui. and here: http://bit.ly/20Gvbh6..
His last post was rather more thought provoking: http://bit.ly/2gJtDae
But here he gives us an insight to what he rants about. He sang this to us in class (he actually has a great voice!0
A Performance ‘Rant’ Poem
(Sung to ‘My Favourite Things’ from the Sound of Music)
Cellophane covers you cannot unravel
Berks on their mobiles who call as they travel
Automated checkouts, where you need a degree
To not end up paying for things that are free.
Hundreds of passwords I never remember
Christmas ads in August instead of December
Scammers who ring us to lie and confuse
Stories they spin are all merely a ruse.
White lines on highways that no-one considers
Chewing gum spat out by kids and sightseeers
Owners of dogs who let them roam free
To crap on my garden and pee on the tree.
All our bobbies,
Dressed like zombies
With no time to chat
So I simply remember these things make me mad
And then I don’t get wound up.