What’s your Work Love/Appreciation Test?

I heard through the human resources grapevine about the Love Test, in which Gary Chapman’s “Five Love Languages” theory has been adapted to workplace “appreciation” training. This is, naturally, HR’s fault. After many decades in the human resources trenches, I know that everyone hates HR because…well, because they’re HR. Sadly, many human resources executives cling to the cherished illusion that employees can be trained to appreciate each other (by which they mean, of course, appreciate HR). In fact, however, employees reserve all their appreciation for only two things—money, and being left alone. (Or three things if your company has Donut Day.)

Still, never let it be said that I was unwilling to do my part to further scientific research. After careful preparation, I was ready to take the Love Test. The only free version was for couples, but their literature points out that the same…